ok, his religious views on facebook are madonna lyrics. we no longer have to wonder about his sexuality.
Nothing like hearing a USA chant while getting head. God bless America.
dude wearing that thong all day was not worth the 7 bucks
Im invoking the "no judgements" clause of our friendship.
My god, what have you done?
Roommate is hosting a 'sorority retreat' at our house. If you need to get laid, stumble on over.
As soon as the clock wound down to zero, she declared "HALF-TIME HEAD" and pulled down my pants. After the swallow, she said "BEER CHASER," got me a new one, and asked if she could make me a sandwich. Pretty sure she's lobbying hard for a ring.
Vodka and tater tots have managed to satisfy me more than most of the guys I've slept with.
almost dropped my phone in the toilet but it somehow bounced off my tit and landed on the floor. Boobs: saving me hundreds of dollars in bar tabs and smartphones since '09
Dinner at 5, shrooms at 10.
it's like he didn't even know what a vagina was
sitting in the prison waiting room in my boyfriends clothes. looooong story.
I just bought sparkling water with plan B. I am the most basic bitch to ever exist.
I was told I was gorgeous and a whore by the drag queens. My night is complete.
I guess it's too forward to greet him with a blow job?
I didn't expect the hobit to have that much sexual tension.
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