listening to techno makes your hand move faster while masterbating
You just compared our sex life to a seven year old kid.
We were in the backseat and he was giggling uncontrolably. It felt like I was giving head to a 10 year old girl.
My roommate found me crawling down the hallway as she was on her way to her morning class. Its time for a new semester.
I seriously think I have a tan line on my stomach from getting a boner while in the taning bed.
Girl passed out in class and vomited. Another victim of syllabus week
looking back it was a good thing we were too wasted to fire up the chainsaw
Every time I get scared about the fact that I'm falling for him I remember that he juggles and is hung like a mastadon and everything is a-ok.
I call BS on that! THAT WAS TOTALLY AN INTERCEPTION. JENNINGS HAD THAT.
PEOPLE ARE FLIPPING FURNITURE HERE. IN THE ROOM ABOVE ME. I HEARD SOMEONE WOOKIE CALL IN ANGER FROM SOMEWHERE IN THIS BUILDING.
I'd be lying if I said I wasn't scared, even a little.
there is a hole burned clean through my text book on forestry law and I saw you walking around with a blowtorch last night. Hope you have $160 on ya...
I told him finishing at the same time would be a long-term project. Like flipping a house. A sexual house.
Crying on the toilet and taking a shit. This is what being an adult is about
Is it bad that I'm using the photo I took for my fake ID as my linkedin profile pic?
Why would you trust me with ANYTHING!!!???
I learned tonight while in another country that no matter the nationality, men are disappointing in bed
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