What kind of soap washes out shame, bad decisions, and whiskey?
Irish Spring?
My parents came down to check and make sure I wasn't into any mischief then proceeded to give me alcohol.
I bet her clit looks like pig in a blanket.
his mom and i are swapping prescript pills..totally mother in law material.
It was all going great until he pulled the hamburger meat out of his pocket
I once puked on the side of the hwy driving home and it somehow made me feel more Canadian. So don't rule it out
pain. pain everywhere. this is why throwing yourself at concrete is a bad idea.
She wants to go as a facebook "like" for halloween, but right now her costume looks more like the hamburger helper hand with broken fingers.
Remember that girl that we found passed out in the dorm study room under a pile of money and jimmy johns wrappers? She's standing right on front of me.
Are we on the same shift tomorrow and more importantly do you want your pants back?
MY TITS ARE PERFECTLY CALM.
I'm really ok with inappropriate relationships. They are my favorite of all the relationships. No need to be timid. For crying out loud.
And you know what the worst part is? Because of him I can now relate to a goddamn Taylor Swift song. FUCK. MY. LIFE.
I just masturbated at work... Don't know why but I thought you should know
my near death experience doubled as my sexual awakening
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