Culvers...So Good
So good. The butter burgers slip right outta my ass.
She is my favorite of all the girls you have fucked. Other than me.
If im going to fail a midterm I might as well be drunk while I do it
i lose more brain cells when ever she opens her mouth then i would doing meth for 8 years of my life.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I only keep her as my best friend so she wont hook up with my ex.
I don't know if it was his cologne or his Jesus hair, but he was much more fuckable than last time I saw him.
Now that I think about it, it may have been the 6 pitchers of beer.
He pissed on a police station. Then expected to not be arrested. Sounds accurate.
Your stories are the best. I feel like you're a spy among the heteros. It's not fair.
I told this guy in the dining hall that he's a hippie god and he's never made eating yogurt so sexy
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Trying to decide who to DD on the fourth and I came up with a Who's who of guys I've hooked up with in the last month. Not an ideal situation, but I have a feeling it's gonna happen anyway.
I smell like lime and condoms and I really want a waffle. Fuk
Being drunk with magicians is fucking mind blowing. This Asian guy just made a platypus appear and disappear. This is not a drill.
Most drunken moment of the night is me pouring Chanel no. 5 all over your boobs and rubbing it in...
Wedding party came into the bar an hour ago. Mother of the bride is a stage five clinger. send help.
Come over I need help. I just almost died in an acid flashback while listening to do You Feel Like We Do off of the Frampton Comes Alive album.
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