I just hope my dad was drunk enough to not remember the whole convo we had about anal.
ha- omfg whatt the fuck is wrong w me. Alcohol+third cousins= bad decisions
Its like we are women, and boise state is a gangster rap song. This game is degrading
enterprise is going to pick me up, im too high for this
These 29 Nasty People Went To The Bathroom In Public
She was asian and in a relationship... my two weaknesses
Um he just came into the kitchen naked to get her purse or something?
And then I asked the bartender for my third shot and he told me he had to cut me off at two because this was in fact a family fun center
Dude your not gonna get by security covered in blood wearing only a robe
Don't worry I'm drunk they won't say anything
Don't pretend like we're functional. We're gonna discuss this drunkenly via text the way serious conversations should take place.
19 People Who Had An Inappropriate Celebrity Encounter
I wish there was an emoji to express our Eskimo Brothership
That is was cool to fuck the single mother accross the street until every girl i bring home gets the car keyed.
If there's one thing i learned from edward 40hands is that i couldnt handle life with bottles for hands
Your vagina felt like having sex with thanksgiving mashed potatoes. The best kind of mashed potatoes
she was puking nonstop out of the car window in the rain during our hour long drive back, we got lot of honks
I've now fucked in every motel room in this small town.