I slayed a troll last night at BC guess i thought i was back in college
i wish mother nature was an actual person cause i'd bitch slap her for sure
i asked why he had a giant piece of popcorn duct taped to his head and he said "No, it's actually part of my neck." so no, i didn't fuck him.
She made me put my jeans under her mattress so that I wouldn't leave in the morning while she was still sleeping. Apparently I just look like "that guy".
he's 25, hott, and leaving for iraq tuesday, i wanna get in as much as possible...
your life is a nick sparks novel waiting to happen
i just traded 2 rolls of toilet paper for half a water bottle of vodka. i love college
He's worked out some sort of arangment where all three of them are dating each other and they've all moved into an apt. with two king beds pushed together
A true beacon of hope in these dark times
Still at home. Videotaping hamsters.
It's a mix of hot dirty sex and week old bong water
He gave me an orgasim so fantastic that I had an asthma attack.
I don't know where I'm at. But I'm pretty sure what I'm looking at is a small bear.
If you can't trust the person at the taco cabana drive thru, who can you trust?!
I woke up wearing nothing but my red thigh high socks and a blue wig. I have no idea what happened.
he said to "slap him" after he guessed the time correctly. i did.
It seems I've entered my 21st birthday the same way I entered this world: naked, crying and smothered in someone else's bodily fluids...
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