So pretty much, I was trying to piece last night together and remembered a point where I was pointing to you heart then touching your face. I'm not sure that I ever translated that to "I like your personality better than your looks" but that's what I meant
I found a vibrator in my car and it's not mine...this is becoming a weird day.
I just scratched behind my ear and found icing. Fuck you.
I feel compelled to tell you that I woke up this morning and found an entire corn on the cob in my purse. Ive decided not to question my drunken behavior anymore, and to just accept it as my lifestyle.
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Girls night always turns into let's seperate and get laid night.
Hm, finding a time when my drinking and your real life don't conflict could be difficult
I just bought $54 in Easter crap to try and blend in the pregnancy test... And FYI, it totally worked.
Last thing I remember clearly was, "ok, but if we're are gonna get drunk before class, there's no half-doing this"
You forgot your "boyfriend" from last night on my couch. You're suppose to bring that shit with you.
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Lets go hit some boners bro!
I appreciate the acceptance and inclusion, but that's not how we gay men talk.
He just said his penis sings like Mariah Carey...Im going with drunken.
Sitting topless in my room drinking wine from a box... It's good to be back at school
I appreciate the I'll come bail you out of jail tone in the text
Can you explain to me why I showed my boobs to the firemen to get free beer?
If history is any guide, his morals are no match for my tits
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