I feel like none of my dresses scream slut the way I'd like them to
and the award for most disgusting thing ever done on my couch now officially goes to you! Congratulations, you won the couch...I can't even look at it anymore.
My number one goal in life is to find out who can fill a keg with Popov
Fuck a-yeah! I just found a wine key. Let 'Don't Fuck With Me Friday' commence.
This girl ordered Hershey syrup and red wine and he made it for her
Did you send me a snapchat of your sister triple kissing two other girls?!!! You might be the greatest friend the world ever made
I think I caught your cold through my vagina. It was worth it.
i have to vacuum my washing machine now, asshole
These past few weeks have been a lesson on why you don't put your penis inside girls who live in your building.
he left a full can of coors light underneath my windshield wiper, like a love note. if that's not husband material, i don't know what is
I'm a grown ass woman, I need to get fucked
Oohh. Then yes, he is the Alpha Fuckboy.
I lick assholes and I wouldn't eat mdma
Hey what you doing tonight?
Working at the hospital! So hurt yourself and come visit :)
See you in about a hour
We live walking distance from the coors factory. no, we do not have a dry week.
Randomize
