You're such a slut.
I prefer opportunist.
Dude, everyone in your family has slept with that girl. Her vagina is like the Hindu version of a Bar Mitzvah.
It's called penis withdraw. Or alcoholism. I get them confused these days.
You were making dinosaur noises while jerking me off..
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Yes, I did know where her mouth had been, but frankly I think it was a lesson you needed to learn.
There's a Russian guy here. In the bar. Drinking vodka. Wearing a trench coat and a hat and a mustache. Idk where the confusion is.
Drinking vodka straight from my water bottle because of the debate. I just need to forget.
My aunt comes over, haven't seen her in 4 years. First thing, looks me up and down and goes "...yup, that pair ripened nicely. Theyll get you some free drinks"
I think you were raised by the wrong sister
I know the wedding is going to be a good time, I don't have to wear a bra with my dress
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Idk my boobs are big but i dont think theyre hide a flask in them big..
I stepped in puke last night then washed it off my shoe with beer. Is there a grace period to respect before wearing them to class?
WHY didn't you stop me from ordering $900 worth of socks last night when I was very obviously judgement impaired at the time?!?!
You ripped his router out of the wall and screamed "I have defeated the matrix"
When the nurses wouldn't let him smoke in the hospital he decided to just roll around on the floor.
She asked me if I could do that to her every single time. I said nope. sometimes it's better.
Randomize