When i tried to give you something that wasn't tequila...like water....you kept saying it was against your religion.
I've always been the spiritual type.
I've decided I'm just gonna keep drinking til the baby bump shows...
I could feel myself puking on my feet but it was so warm i didnt even care.
You "were" hungover, which is past tense. So that gives you no excuse not to go out tonight.
there is a strobe light in my taxi. in what way is this safe.
Judge me...This apron fits PERFECTLY when I have no clothes on
Who said I was judging? More like congratulating.
So the old dude that tried to fight me is definitely Katie's dad. And the pot cookie's kicking in. Shit is getting weird.
Yeah I figured you were blackout when you were Shakira dancing on the floor.
I just gave a bum a ride back to his bench. Columbus is weird but I like it.
No. 70% of the female population would find them attractive. The other 30% are lesbian and even they would appreciate them for their strong bodies and athletic capabilities.
I'm glad your nude photos turned out "classy" but you cannot hang them in the living room.
Do you want to go soon I'm overthinking life and my butthole again
Is it just me or is Michael Jackson blasting throughout the house
I need an outfit for the bar tmrw that reads I have daddy issues and would like a fancy sugar daddy.
His mom just pulled off a quadruple cockblock. I'm not sure if I'm mad or impressed?
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