WTF?! TAYLOR SWIFT JUST WON ARTIST OF THE YEAR OVER MICHAEL JACKSON?! WHAT IS THIS WORLD COMING TO?!
Just bought a disco ball for 5 dollars, of course we're drinking tonight.
Please tell me how you drunkenly remembered your social security number when we were checking you into the ER.
You're making her cookies in enchange for knitting lessons. You will die a virgin.
we probably should not get naked in my neighbor's garage again. just sayin
I puked walking onto the plane. How do you think my post-Birthday hangover went?
She's riding a bike down the street and drinking brown liquor. A pt cruiser is honking at her and she's like I HEAR YOU!!
i want to live in a society where a 20 year old can wear pigtails and not get them called handlebars, because i look fucking adorable in them.
I think that thing where I have 2 boyfriends is happening again
Go to a building you've never been before and take a shit. It's marvelous
He's over here like "remember those pics you sent me a couple years ago? Those were hot." And I'm like "remember talking about what we were gonna name our kids a couple months ago? That was hot." Therein lies the disconnect
Went home with a guy last night with Taco Bell sauce in my hair and on my pants
I think that maybe Alyssa may of had too much to drink. is it normal for her to straddle random people in quizno's?
Why were u walkin around mc with a toilet bowl lid handcuffed to u and carrying a stuffed Teddy bear last night?
He slept outside in his hammock, and then took a lawn chair with him in the shower because he was too drunk to stand up.
Randomize
