Ok let me ask a question, does aderall make women less apt to have sex?
Cause it just destroys penises
Was that inappropriate? I can't gauge these things anymore
I found the orange juice, it was hiding in the vodka...trickster.
my boobs are a 3G dead zone. as soon as i take my phone out of my bra, it has a signal again.
she says her boyfriend and her dignity are both out of town tonight
She clogged the toilet and got it out with a seven eleven bag. I tried to tell her no but she was convinced that was the logical thing to do.
A piece of cheeseburger just fell between my tits. Consider this a "wish you were here" postcard.
i feel like this needs to be a 'lose some teeth' kind of weekend.
I hit on her. So did Sarah. Neither of us got anywhere. I swear she's asexual. Like Switzerland.
Ice skating? Did you see me last night? I don't even know where my socks are
I just sneezed and it made my entire body ache. Hungover is an understatement
That is NOT what pussyfooting around means. Try that again with your toe and I break it off.
Is it a bad thing that I'm trimming my nose hairs in anticipation for the 8ball to be delivered?
So I've been in more fights on one leg than I've had on two.
Well, i'm not hugging a bag of cheetos and crying while I watch Friends wishing that we were Ross and Rachel. So clearly I'might doing better than last night.
And when were you going to tell me to stop dancing on his coffee table singing "come on irene?"
Randomize
