You should really figure out how to get me a picture that will pop up on my phone when you call
Just upload a picture of Bea Arthur. That's what my soul looks like these days
why does hillary duff have a greatest hits album?
Just finished my law exam. Questions 4-18 seemed to pertain specifically to things we've done this semester.
I don't even know. I woke up to a text from someone named Vick saying he was 'legit worried' that I had herpes.
i've hooked up with him and three of his roommates and not a single one of them knows about it..think its safe to say i found the silver lining in a boys inability to communicate
yea man just watch out- theres a shitload of broken glass in your bed
Our sex bag has now been upgraded to sex luggage, with wheels, and now features a first aid kit. Game. On.
You have to sext the same way you right a resume, you can only use active verbs
For future reference.... When you take a beer out of a 6pack... You don't insert your phone as a substitute.
I told the guy that if he didn't put enough pepperoni to earn the name " pepperoni feast", that I was gonna sue him for all he had. Believe it or not, that's all I remember.
Wanna know what sucks. Banging the bosses daughter at work and having the boss walk in while you are fucking on his desk. Good day though. Made 6 sales
I wish I got like a congrats basket for being a responsible sexually active member of society complete with condoms, tissues and lollipops.
Me and Jason had to grab your legs and arms and drag you in the house. You kept screaming "leave me for dead"
If my birthday doesn't end with my panties hanging from a ceiling fan, I'm holding you responsible.
not only was there glitter in the toilet after i peed, but there was some on the toilet paper after i wiped. this cant be healthy.
Randomize