what if I'm pregnant?
smusmorshion
i woke up this morning next to my toilet covered in an attempt to make blanket of toilet paper
Just found out my mom's voicemail password is 6969..
They ran out of vodka so we started doing Body Doritos.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Omg. I bid $3000 on a cave in Afghanistan on EBay last night.
Just found cake in my bra, debating if I should eat it
I did nothing besides stay sober all night, I walked home to find max naked knocking cups off the counter with his cock lol
Should we start at nine like normal people or now like alcoholics?
How many vodka infused gummi bears count as 1 drink?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
him and the cab driver we buy e from got into a fist fight, about which show is better, futurama or family guy.
Dont even get me started. you fell asleep in my kitchen after being cockblocked when you tried to use my roommates bedroom.
I'm not sure how long my penis is exactly, but I will tell you it resembles a bendy straw
HOW DID I LET MYSELF GET SUCKED IN HE HAS A PENIS FOR PETE'S SAKE.
Dude on a beach in sicily and a blonde jesus just smoked us out and then tried to makeout with me I am never leaving this place
I did what i always do when i miss him; masturbate and watch Bridges of Madison County.
Randomize