I'm pretty sure I left my reasoning skills at home last night, and just brought anger and rage with me.
I think we should see other people.
Already working on it.
She made me put my jeans under her mattress so that I wouldn't leave in the morning while she was still sleeping. Apparently I just look like "that guy".
i just uploaded pictures of my nephew, and you & d puking in the same toilet. i think i should keep them in the same album. show my nephew what he has to look forward to.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm one shot of soco 100 away from fucking a mailbox
I finally won that bet on when the anorexic girl would pass out at the gym. You owe me 10 now
Do you remember giving me altiods and wishing me good luck on the walk home?
You would not believe how incredibly hard it is to climb on top of a three story apartment buildings roof from the air conditioning unit
i just peed with my friends in your backyard... do you still live here
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It was like a square peg in a round hole... I've never seen one shaped like a stick of butter...
I have a bottle of rum in my pocket...what does that say about me...
You come prepared
(440): please tell me you didn't have sex in my dress.. IT'S A VIRGIN DRESS.
SOOOOOO I just attempted to go to the gym, hungover. Ended up throwing up in the bathroom. I hope people think I'm just working out really hard
Bro, I live in a constant state of existential dread and moderate ennui. The prospect of cosmic horror doesn’t faze me that much.
The progression was banging a stripper banging an unemployed stripper banging a sexual entrepreneur quarantining with benefits totally fucking whipped. Get it right dude
Randomize