so she proceeds to puke everywhere, look up at me like a sick dog, and then say, "i'll finish if you want me to."
so I just asked a Chinese man and found out our tattoos actually mean vagina...
Yeah, she'd be cute...but she has faith. It's a problem down south.
The girl next to me in class is taking notes on woman's suffrage with a girls gone wild pen.
your cum blends into my yellow sheets :/
i need you to recap everything for me beyond "i think i'm gonna try vodka-pong"
Can we please not be like these pathetic people in their thirties who only get drunk when they go see Sherrill Crow?
You just kept saying "they don't make cigarettes for squirrels. Yet."
His pick up line was "your one sexy pumpkin, I'd love to carve." Why would you let me go home with him?
You know what? I bet HE would do stormtrooper roleplay with me. I'm in.
and ive been naked for the greater part of the evening. alone, drunk, and naked. i think that is how all great interventions start.
he congratulated me on my ability to grow long hair after pulling it to see if i had extensions
First of all she starred talking about God which immediately killed my buzz
He told me that after two hours of fucking he feels as though his dick wants to detach from his body and go to Mexico..
He adjusted my bra straps while I blew him.
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