check it out our google latitudes are spooning
yeah I know. she is a stupid fat trailer trash bitchwhore and I hate her
but when she came up to me in the bar I had to be all like "OMG HEYYY how are you, I haven't seen you in foreverrrrr!!"
but for the record, yeah, I hope she gets mauled by a bear and dies
and by charming I mean he has a horse cock.
i just watched a video of two girls fucking with a banana and i thought of you.
i hate you
Used tampon in my purse. That from you?
He gave me the "I've pictured you while jerkin off" look
Soo I got blood taken today and when the doctor came back with the results she said "you aren't sick but the tests show that you are currently drunk..."
i'm taking a spore imprint of the mushroom we found growing in our bathroom and sending a picture to ryan. he will then be able to tell if it's trip-worthy
I woke up to find my purse full of puke, and all I could think was not again.
I can't drink with the moms anymore. All they talk about is lactating.
It's gay softball weekend. Lots of hot gay strangers to go home with.
I distinctly remember telling him "I'll suck your dick while you eat pizza"
My fridge door just caught on fire somehow.
I immediately woke up from my nap, made myself a screwdriver and got in the shower. I know it's spring break but I'm still questioning my life choices.
Not sure she's stomping around my apartment muttering incoherently about wanting to speak to the colonel
Randomize
