in pain and im wearing pink underwear
so?
i dont own pink underwear
come over anyways, right now, right this second
it can be a super quick quicky, then you can go back to studying
wow, that sounds SO fun, please stop enticing me with premature ejaculation
oh btw spread eagle is not an appropriate phrase to use in a scientific presentation. learned that the hard way
I know your texting costs money, but I'll pay for it if you consider this. Oversized frozen jello shots. I'll buy everything needed if you approve. Let me know
This honesty session brought to you by jagermeister inc.
Your panties and toothbrush are in your mailbox. just not ready to be with anyone serious. take care.
Life for us students isn't all fun and drunken lesbian affairs you know
College has taught me that the "best idea" is rarely the fun one.
This is true but you can't really get fired from college
nothing can ever be as bad as the night i blacked out, updated my fb status to i need a pity fuck and then passed out for 13 hours.
Thats why you dont have a "jubilant gunfire celebration"
I'm proud of you for choosing to be an organ donor on your fake!!
I know I've become a responsible adult because this time, I'm not going to do the drugs I found on the ground
Is it weird that the best sex I've ever had was to Barbara Streisand's Christmas album?
I work 80 hours a week to prevent myself from just laying in bed and masturbating all day. It's a hands off strategy.
I just came rly close to telling a dude that I want to chew on him and there should be an oil painting of his ass up in the louvre before I realized that isn't how flirting is supposed to go
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