I solve my problems like an adult, at the strip club drinking on a work night.
I just had sex in the back of an ambulance. Call me.
Man now I have poo on my blackberry!!!
brownberry?
You would think that an uncircumcised man would understand how the hood of a clit works.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She's like the pied piper of lesbians.
It was everywhere, it looked like he just took the leftovers and threw them around the bathroom... Festively...
If I squint, he looks like Jude Law. But that's kind of a weird face to make during sex.
It was only 12:11 and I needed to make a Pepto Latte and call it a night, I don't remember that being part of my new years resolution.
I wish I could go about my daily activities with his dick inside me
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just found scrambled eggs in my shower. Thanks for that, asshole.
Nothing more ironic than raw dogging some random Asian hottie last night and then doing the walk of shame home from her place mixed in with the participants of the AIDS walk
Heat not working dressed like an eskimo. A real one with a ski sock on my junk
Just Peed in a cup for my country. Fighting the good fight.
I definitely don't have enough experience with hookers to be in this group text anymore.
Just paid for birth control in all ones do you think she is judging me?
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