Just saw a white stretch Hummer limo outside of CiCi's pizza. Way to live up to the stereotypes, Alabama.
I was so high i started crying when i saw how much puppychow was there.
because whats more american than sleeping with a westpoint cadet on the 4th of july?
come help me. im curled up in the fetal position on the upper floor of the lib. please bring more caffeine or alcohol
its ok. its hell week the lib is a no judgment zone right now
Jazzercise themed birthday pub crawl. 6 bars in 6 hours.everyone was a hot mess.
I seriously had to check my phone this morning to make sure I didn't agree to any strange sexual favors.
A beer is a heart your wish makes!!!
You know my ex in high school who cheated on me and dumped me right before prom? A decade later, I just saw her again...working at an Arby's. it was a good day...
Using the random money I found in my bra from Halloween to pay to print my bio notes. I only brought a debit to the bar. College win.
I feel like I should throw some tampons around my workspace so everyone will know what's really going on
I got drunk and tried to make special rice krispie treats, but I made a mess and they were all stuck to my hands, so I just decided to eat my way out of the catastrophe and I think shit's about to get even weirder than usual.
Wet should excavate the hamsters out of the front yard n give them a proper burial.
So you're mad that I let you go home with the guy with soft hands but yet you can't understand that I was just trying to help you
it’s not easy to sexualize brunch. work with me, babe.
I think I'm the first girl to break a bed with a guy, without even having sex with him while doing so.
Randomize
