benefit of terrorism--they won't let you buy random one way plane tickets to random parts of the country for no reason nonmatter how high you are.
Found your pants in the mailbox
What were my pants doing in the mailbox?
I don't know but there's postage on them
I hope the dean has a raincoat on because I'm prolly gonna throw up on him when I get my degree
I would never do this in real life. It's only college.
She wanted to roleplay. Apparently you be snow and i'll be a plow wasn't an option
Also I spent like 2 hours on the hubble/nasa website sunday night looking at pictures of outer space and cried my face off at how beautiful and complex it is. What's wrong with me?!
He lasted about 30 seconds then said you can't win them all. But then he made me pancakes so it's okay. We shall call him mancakes.
We have to have sex twice when i get back. I miss you sex, and thank god the nhl lockout is over sex. I will happily let you wear your sharks jersey during it and i will wear my ducks jersey, and it will be mad rivalry sex.
Right now I'm standing in front of my fridge, drinking wine out of the bottle and eating cold steak with my hands. I am THE BEST at being single.
He says I vaguely mumbled happy New year, kissed him, threw up and then went back to sleep.
I look excited, but its just a facade.
You pee in parking lots....i drive home naked.....thats the american dream i was promised
Dude. That's like masturbating until the point that you're going to climax, then stopping, waiting for a few seconds and then starting all over. While that does lead to an altogether more powerful orgasm, it's still annoying as hell until you get there.
I was not expecting that analogy.
No one ever expects that analogy.
I couldn't be more proud to be a cougar. Just wondering how these twenty somethings learned how to fuck so well? Must be porn.
Sorry. Im too sleepy to penis.
Randomize
