i'm not going because i feel like it's just gunna be a "this is your life" who i banged this years addition
Well, you're either very drunk or very high but I'll let it slide because I love any type of conversation concerning cheese.
I've officially decided that whoever created hate sex should be on my christmas card list.
I told him I was engaged, had 911 on speed dial and made him wear his seatbelt, then dropped his drunk ass off at his motel...probably not the night he was expecting.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
No, I got those cupcakes fair and square. That homeless man should have known not to underestimate the determination of a stoned chem student.
I wore water proof eyeliner just incase the first picture of me of 2012 is a mugshot
Guys with values who care about your personality don't cum on your back the 2nd time they you sleep with you.
Come part with me. By you sleep! No fun. Idek feelings Sorry for your life.
It's gay pride, I'm in my EMT uniform getting more girls than your straight ass ever will..
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Yeah, I fucked him. and the worst part is his name was Jesus. And nobody said it in Spanish. Just Jesus. There is no way I can avoid burning when I walk into a church from now on.
You're the only person not starstruck by him
Yes. That tends to happen after you regularly lick someone's balls.
Was the guy in the cowboy hat kinda hot or have I just not had sex in a really long time?
But what if there are 6 people and they end up just pairing the off into 3 couples. Is it still an orgy?
This reminds me of the time you were crying and puking in the toilet at that party while i did shots of tequila in between blow drying your feet. miss you!
I think I kinda scared him when I tried to wrap his snake around his dick while he was trying to nap.
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