O no, u 2 are dating again?
No. I just masturbate furiously to his picture
i felt like cinderella. except at midnight i turned back into a whore.
All his texts have the signature of a date with a smile. I asked him what it means. IT'S THE DAY HE QUIT DOING DRUGS
They're calling for 20 inches of snow but I'll have a dirtbike for emergency trips to the liquor store. Even if I crash it won't hurt.
planned ethnic drinking holidays while bored at work thru next may. I don't suppose you have any scots or russian in you?
The other. Cat spoke to me and left. This shit is laced
The first cat might save me but they are taking out masks
As i was laying there shouting that he dislocated my hip he actually reached his armed around and patted himself on the back
I stared at him for a solid five minutes because he looked like what I imagine god would look like if god was a lumberjack
In other news my pubic hair is covered in glitter.
You know i love you, but i just cannot fuck you until your eyebrow grows back. It's too hard not to laugh.
Poor guy. Tried so hard to get out of the friend zone. I had to make out with someone in front of him to put him in his place.
Why are friend nudes not more of a thing? My tits look awesome right now.
I'm eating shredded cheese and chugging coke, until I can function again. I'm tingling everywhere
I fell out of the car while it was moving then got puked on then puked and cried about then got back in the car and puked out the window when we started moving again
Why exactly is there a butt plug on the counter?
Randomize
