I haven't seen him in over a year. He asked me to his prom over myspace. Is he fucking serious?
youll never guess who i didnt fuck at that party
Its like we are women, and boise state is a gangster rap song. This game is degrading
Anywhere you can eat green eggs and ham, you can have sex.
just got drunk at a party with Christmas themed solo cups.. holidays are officially here.
no seriously he was fingering me like he was really really frantically looking for a song on his iPod.
Turns out my drunken logic and wordsmithing isn't quite the same as the sober version. I'm pretty sure I made fun of the managers mom at one point
Side note, we are 25 fighting over our sophmore year RAs Drunk facebook attention
Things got outta hand once she told me to water-board her with Patron.
I would take a bullet for Beyonce's baby
You kept saying you we're gonna puke and wanted to steal my pants
That does not explain the remnants of a small fire in my bathtub.
Kid got so high from the brownies he forgot his own name. Welcome to college.
Welp... sober this am and I still have a parrot.
dave might be using McDoubles to pay for dances
he has gotten at least 7 lap dances out back
Just found out my dad smokes weed too. Mom, grandma, all aunts and uncles, and now my dad too. It's like I'm genetically engineered to be a stoner.
Randomize
