I'm pretty sure my roommate has taken plan B more times than i've had sex. Not sure how that makes me feel.
I like complaining with weaving words and complex sentences. It makes me seem more sophisticated and less bitchy.
All I remember was yelling at him, "Its becasue of people like you that it took us so long to get to the moon!"
You just kept saying "they don't make cigarettes for squirrels. Yet."
It's a special occasion. Hence the 151.
Was awful. Wedding photos taken by a river with used syringes floating past. Had to ask the bride to put down a can of rum to have her photo taken.
they drunkenly created an obstacle course for the poor hamster and its ball.
I may or may not go. send a pic of a nipple so I know how much fun you're having
I'm just crazy horny about you
You should have. Partying with 60 year olds and batman is so much better than partying with bitches our age.
I was Jaeger weird. I was rolling on the floor pretending to be an Olympic gymnast and my name was Gina
I just faked an orgasm while masturbating. Idk what exactly my problem is but I have one
I went 670% over budget on my vacation. My accountant would flip if he weren't me.
How the fuck do you have so much free time?
Polyphasic sleep schedule.
Always a gay best friend, never a bridesmaid
is caitlin alive?
ya she's alive she's watching a movie
ok remind her she drank toilet water then.
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