doesn't he have a GF?
that just means you have to try harder.
i didn't have to try TOO hard, just told him i didn't want to know his name or...
My wife all of the sudden got markedly better at giving blow jobs. Should I be happy or concerned?
Believe it's possible to jerk off while watching the food network.
we just did breakfast shots, I have a black eye and savage garden is on . Best weekend ever
you know that dress I got margarita and puke on? yeah, just returned it.
So..I walked into his bathroom and found a bong and a blender in the shower.....normal?
Pregnant only lasts nine months, being hot takes way longer to go away. So yes, I will continue to hit on the hot pregnant girl.
we agreed that it was acceptable to get the cat high as long as we gave her a lot of food.
i saw the poster for your lost tequila... what a shame
Please. I don't care how shitty his fake life story was. As horny as I was I just wanted the prettiest man possible in case I accidentally got pregnant. He had blue eyes.
Its not that hard, just find a girl reading 50 shades of grey and point her my way
I thought i didnt really feel whatever i snorted last night until i just realized i think i asked this dude to punch me fight club style
I want the address of the individual responsible for strawbeeritas. I want to send them gift basket.
It's cool bro. The video I have of you drunk trying to fix it with the sonic screwdriver was worth it.
You made the lady who made your cheeseburger sign the box so that when she got famous you would have her autograph.
Randomize
