bahahahaha i would laugh soo hard if someone did this for me hahahaha this guy would become my best friend
he spit gasoline on a tiki torch to impress a girl. he caught on fire but did get laid. success.
if that blanket by the dog bowl was your dog's "bed" then i apologize to bailey for having sex on it
Just hooked up with a girl I met in line at Taco Bell. I told you leave me to do my own thing and I'll get it in
you kept thanking chef boyardee for having pull tab cans
His "hunger Strike for change" lasted 4 days. Hi welcome to my coke binge last weekend....not impressed
Don't worry that pussy is fresh, I'd brush my teeth with it.
When I was with you my penis felt like a fat woman crammed into a pair of lulu lemons
If you see my mugshot on the news tomorrow, its not what you think
LinkedIn just suggested I might know the guy I caught my wife fucking.
I blacked out at work again... Except this time my boss watched me throw up by the bus stop and some woman let me sleep on her shoulder for an hour. Why does this keep happening?
Wow! It's so great to hear from you! We all thought you perished in Winepocalypse 2012, man.
I had to ask her to let go of my cock this morning so I could go home. She just kept saying "no, please, no..."
There's a point in life when you've got to take dick like a big girl.
I need to leave my mind and my stupid vagina are having fight over who's right
Randomize