I just didn't expect you to be so naked....
Registered for next semester classes drunk. Let's hope I didn't accidently sign up for history of dinosaurs again...
she moaned out jack bauer's name while i was banging her...
My dora the explorer band aid does not cover up the shame i feel right now
Even after projectile vomiting watermelon on the beach, it still sounds appetizing.
talk of her extensive whoreness has crossed oceans. thats impressive.
how did the keg end up in the top bunk?
The walls are thin & apartments are narrow so all the bedrooms are next to each other. Our complex could compete in synchronized orgasms.
Now I know he's not trying to fuck me. He took me to lunch at White Castle.
Decided in my tanked state last night purchase 2 weeks worth of xanax, so I can guess my way thru this week and finals. Soberly, I decided it would be a great way to test my knowledge of finance.
She walks around topless and loves making sandwiches. That's how a one-night stand turned intoa relationship
So I had sex in the woods today. Anything else that happened today? Irrelevant. It was a GOOD day.
tuscaloosa is terrifying
like people here are just empty shells of drugs and sin
there is no mercy here
I need to stop agreeing to hang out with people when I'm drunk.
Imagine we only get one cock for the rest of your life. I’d pick his dick. That good!
Randomize
