but it happened after you broke up with me and before we made up.
she said it was okay because they were "professional" nude pictures of her on the internet
It is obvious to me now why clam chowder & beer aren't a good combo.
We just found a handle of vodka in our fridge and no one knows how it got there. God I love spring break.
They have an open bar at this baby shower. I was born to be Cuban.
He's texting from midnight mass asking for nude pics. Baby Jesus is spinning in his manger as we speak
I remember caressing his hands asking him if he moisturized, then i proceeded to put his hands on my face
what's your room number? I've never been there sober...
I know I say this every year but 2015 will be the year I finally have sex with David's sister
A shark bit my leg in the Gulf of Mexico well me and the T were banging so look for it in the papers
You left me with 12 red bulls and a bottle of vodka. What did you expect?
She squirted. We were both surprised. I'm that good.
I can't really feel a difference, so essentially I paid 60 bucks to bedazzle my vag.
FYI - Don’t go in the downstairs bathroom. Ryan is passed out naked on the floor with a raging hard on.
My sister and her gf showed up at my door with no pants on at 4 AM talking claiming its hot.
Randomize
