i just realized that we are the poor version of bethenny and jill from real housewives... and I'm jill. this is a 6.5 on the depressing scale
at least we're not in new jersey
I felt weird they were both staring at me waiting for the scoop on how your vagina felt.
It's sore actually
"Shots" has been nominated for a grammy. Now all of the US has sunken to our level...
I just hit a new low..poured my beer in an empty coke can so I could drink in walmart.
I just want you to know IcyHot in the ear is weird. Don't ask.
Pizza delivery...for when you need to eat your feelings for the sex you aren't having
I pretty much landed into this relationship penis first
Why is my fridge empty save for a basketball???
Gotta get dat. Gotta get dat. Gotta get dat dat dat dat dat ~uterus contraction~
My walk of shame was four miles long and I had to stop for a water break. I am the picture of class.
These flip flops mean I'm casual, but I'm here to fuck.
I can't believe the police had to bring me to my booty call last night
OH MY GOD YOU GUYS I JUST FOUND OUT I HAD PHONE SEX THE OTHER NIGHT
My life. Always pantsless and occasionally topless.
Do you just want me to shit in a Jack-o-latern
Randomize
