ParTy fuckkin suckkkks bro I gotta fid sum biTch 2 leT me fire sum loadz on her FACE!
?
Nah, but can you imagine if I were seriously like that?
I wish everyone walked around campus with a video of what they did this weekend above their heads.
She had a muffin-top while wearing a one piece bathing suit. Thats gotta break one of newton's laws or something
I tried ok? my penis just doesnt like her as much as my mother does
A slipped finger up the butt isn't the end of the world
some drunk guy just paid $3 for each cig that i picked up off the ground. the cigs that he threw on the ground. I might just follow him the rest of the night
Good news: he out-ran the campus police. Bad news: they were chasing him toward the REAL police.
Emergency! LinkedIn connected me to a hotornot hookup from sophomore year... slutty phase sphere has officially invaded grown up professional sphere. My illusions of interweb sexual anonymity have been exploded.
it is a dangerous dangerous place where morals and dignity go to die and all your fantasies about men become reality.
I've noticed we have slowly begun to phase the "B" out of our Bromance.
Some lady found my secret pooping bathroom at work. Do I fight her Highlander style? I made or may not be fashioning a crude sword from seat covers and toilet paper rolls.
Do it. DO IT. There can be only one.
I already left my house once this summer. Maybe we could do something in October.
Scientific fact: if he makes a face like a demonic dog when he's fucking you, makes it easier to fuck without feelings.
I vote we just hike, drink, and destroy dick
The room got awkwardly silent right as i yelled "leave him alone! I know plenty of straight guys who like to suck dick!"
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