i may not always bang 16 year olds but when i do, i prefer hot ones
even iPhones love lady gaga. everytime I type haha it trys to correct it to gaga. this is bullshit...
I mean, there was frosting being put on a tunafish sandwich. Pretty sure she knew we were high.
Somewhere between catching the stove on fire and not being aware of it being on fire while I'm in the living room. I drank too much.
You don't forget tits like those, even if you are vegas drunk.
That makes the second boyfriend of hers that I've fucked. I'm gonna start keeping an eye on every guy she even speaks to. Girl is my sexual rabbit's foot.
this year we will have multiple halloween identities. lesbian couple meets brian and stewie
also, am i correct in guessing that advertising the size of my hypothetical penis is a turnoff to him?
Last night turned out to be an expensive trip to your house between the ticket and the plan b. (Well I haven't gotten that yet)
It took 5 bourbons for him to handcuff and spank me and then he cried after sex. The men that like me are so unstable.
I made him fuck me while wearing a Thor helmat from Walmart. Geek sex is the best sex
At 10 PM you were shit faced in the kitchen makin nachos... Naked. I wasn't sure what to do besides walk away...
Wanna get business drunk and go play golf?
Guuuuurrrrrl! He ate the 🌮like it contained the Covid-19 vaccine!
Sorry I’m late. Got horny watching the traffic report and had to rub one out
Randomize
