so then she threw up in his asshole
yep..that'll do it.
the best things in life are free. have that freshly fucked look and doing the walk of shame by HIS girlfriend.....priceless
I peed while puking? Even better
Yes you most deff did. Ultimate multi tasker you are
could you please explain to me why my jumper cables are on my bedroom floor?
You keep saying things....but all I'm hearing is kegs
Haha jealous. If I could remember my dreams I'm pretty sure they would constantly be about being drunk in foreign countries
she's traveling up the coast with her camera and a stash of pot cookies eating food from different campuses. said she slept in a closet 2 states away last nite... of course I'm interested
Want to come over? I'm getting stoned and watching Netflix and making s'mores over a candle in my room
Dude, did you really "knight me" and tell me I had permission to bang your sister last night?
I told her I named my penis "The Spirit of Exploration." That's all it took.
I just used the proceeds from selling my ex's engagement ring to fund my first date with another girl.
We ate sushi in a hospital bed, then fucked in a bathroom while I wore a gown. Pretty sure she's the one
You were in no condition to manage a 3-way.
Anyways enough about genital fatigue...
What’s the level of adulting when you reschedule a dentist appointment to have a threesome?
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