I dont know why I dont listen to you more often. He wont stop texting me. And his signature is "dancing with no panties on"
you definitely have a few illegitimate kids
probs. Not too worried about it though. MOst girls are too embarrassed that they let me into their pants that they'll never admit its mine
don't ever try to run hungover. just puked mid-run in front of an old couple that were going for a walk. they were horrified.
It's like alcoholism for beginners at my kitchen table.
I've come to realize that after waking up this morning for work no one wins in bar dice.
All I remember is that the bartender wouldn't give me scissors cuz I was too drunk
so why was i the only one who woke up with ham stuck to my ass?
Come my child we shall walk thru the pasture of amazing sex and corndogs. Hint:some corndogs are not corndogs.
I feel you. We can get adjoining rooms. It'll be like Disney world, but with drugs and ivs instead of roller coasters and Mickey Mouse.
Which is way cooler
Nothing will stop me from making the title of my paper "The Great Political Cock Block." Absolutely nothing.
Hmmm, well all I'm saying is don't do anything too irrational because you miss him and are blinded by his large penis.
The only thing I remember is the 300 pound man breaking ur railing from sliding down it at 3 am. Must of been a good night.
they are cutting me off...little do they know I am making a 75 yr old man i named Herbert buy me drinks now...no shame at 11 am...
While finding our clothes afterwards he says..."So do we like have to talk after this?"
Fuck your fuckin pumpkin spice. You and your subtle differences frighten and disgust me.
Randomize
