i just saw someone i know on True Life. i need new friends.
Is it bad that your cum tickles when I swallow it?
don't get me wrong, i love how you're fun and free spirited. but there are some situations...like shooting down a bottle of sambuca standing in the shallow end topless surrounded by my friends
Wish you were here....
And I wish your mouth was around my cock, but that never happens, does it?
Wow, haven't had to deal with the 'stoned at the dinner table' scenario in a while
just looked up how to break up with someone nicely on google. glad to know im not the only one who looks up this shit.
Dude I could put my dick between the gap in her teeth.. This is the last time we are hanging out with Kentucky girls
Hmd? did you really just created an abbrievation for hold my dick?
I mean how do you tell a nurse in the ER that you dislocated your knee giving a blowjob to your boyfriend.
Very innocently.
He turned down jacuzzi sex. He cares more about my vagina than i do.
Probably won't be invited back there again considering last time his purebred corgi ate my pot brownie and had to be rushed to the hospital.
my birth father cheated on his wife with my birth mother. it's literally in my blood to be a home wrecker.
Look, I am sorry I shaved your cat...but get over it.
I admire the fact that you replicated my apartment on the roof but I would appreciate it more if you would move all my stuff off the roof and back into my apartment.
When do you think the murder is going to happen in this Lifetime movie of ours?
Randomize
