bio was interesting today. swabbed my mouth to see what the cells where, ha. found a sperm cell. he was just that awesome
His shirt was in the kitchen sink this morning, I'm pretty sure my roommates know.
I just did the math. 30.36% of girls I've slept with have cheated on a significant other while doing it.
Did you see the video of me eating a marshmellow on fire?
25 People Confess The Most Awkward Situation They’ve Ever Been In
Someone please drive out to my house to bring me a beer.. There are some in the fridge but I just can't get up
I was wondering, is there any way to hook up a lawn hose to a keg?
I dont know what we smoked last night but I woke up and found out I started writing a book called White Trash Princess. Its the best thing Ive ever read
That stripper was not happy when I tried putting a dollar in her court mandated ankle bracket/tracking device
You don't know commitment until you try and waterproof a non-waterproof vibrator
These Are 21 Of The Most Delusional People Ever
We were going to play manhunt in a strip club, calling it mancunt.
there's people who respect me enough not to bang on my bed and i think that's beautiful
First poop in my apartment for the summer, officially settled in. :)
BABE I MISS YOU SO MUCH LIKE THE SADNESS OVERWHELMS BONER ABILITY
I had to try on three different bathing suits to hide my boob hickies
Imagine how different my life would be if I could find a man who gave me more pleasure than pizza at 2am when I'm drunk.