yeah i was sneaking up to her room and on the way i saw a picture of her and left
For the record, a bath beer is far superior to a shower beer...
My fave moment of today was you sitting in a hot pink innertube puking into the ocean in front of a lot of children. i would have held your hair back but the ocean did it for you.
Were taking tot shots. If toddlers could drink these are the size of shots they would take
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm making celebratory pizza rolls. They're a lot like regular pizza rolls, but without the taste of shame.
It was huge And he was twirling it around. Im telling you, beautiful wonderpenis
He's like a perfect storm of amazing hair and horrible judgment.
I'm not wearing underwear, I started my period this morning, and it's super windy. Recipe for disaster?
Did you hear me? I HAVE THE CONTENTS OF AN NBA PLAYER'S CONDOM IN MY BEDROOM TRASHCAN!! This shit is potentially worth millions of dollars to a fertile young female who is ovulating. How do I sell it fast??
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Do I have to formally apologize to Brett for flashing him?
We were destined to go to rehab together
First stoner thought of the day: Life would be so much better if there were more things that were biscuits and gravy flavored.
Thought I was doing makeup today for a photo shoot for a short film. WRONG. Try I'm on the set for a Fucking Sci-Fi PORN.
Uhh dog found a condom. FYI its on the table by couch please dispose of it. No reply Necessary
And then I realized my chick friends consist only of sober you, drunk you and hungover you
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