I just watched a guy get turned down by a prostitute
my head feels like I tried to put alcohol out of business last night
All I seem to do lately is get myself off, take naked pictures and drink beer. I don't know if thats a good or bad thing.
Everybody was literally kung fu fighting
i was so worried that when his hands were down my pants he was going to find the weed i stole from him
When it gets to the point that I'm more comfortable being naked at his house than my own, it's time to readdress the fuckbuddyship.
its official. the only way for my hair to look good is to blow somebody
I don't know if I should be scared or excited that I can officially drink vodka on the rocks like it's 7up.
It's like a double rainbow in both sides of the sky mixed with The Jeffersons.
Tequila Tuesdays need to not carry on throughout the week. Having a sad Saturday
I need my daily rules like rule one don't put your dick in the vacuum cleaner
I would definitely ride that dick into the sunset if nuggets are involved
I just made my dating life into my own game show. would you like to meet the contestants? (photos not included)
Taking a shit in a Texas 7/11... not accepting phone calls now lol
sober me is not impressed with the quality of people that drunk me gives our phone number to
Randomize
