your youtube search consisted of "food slideshow" and "the angry beavers"
you could never motorboat her...you'd have to motor-titanic her
The size of her vagina has nothing to do with the size of her heart bro
Ok, let's play "if you were a slut" again and try and retrace our steps last night..
I'm sorry but I have to break up with you. My wife is pregnant and can't have a girlfriend too.
His penis without viagra is what breaks my heart.
If taco bell and midol can't fix her, she's in gods hands now.
There is is 40 year old penis staring me in the face right now if there was ever a time to be a good friend its right now.
Every bathroom has like throw up and like bagels in it. Richie didn't even have bagels.
What drugs are we doing when you visit?
The correct answer is all the drugs because I just found out they have glow in the dark bubbles.
No one will ever find true happiness until they have gotten stoned and taken off the bra they've been wearing all day.
You, my dear friend, are a poet of the deep mental longings of women worldwide.
I gave him morning sex, a bag of cookies, and dropped him off at work. I believe I deserve the "best hookup award."
The UTI came back with a vengeance.
I guess you never know how much of an impact you have on someone until you sleep with their cousin
one of my students asked me today if i was having a baby. fuckin 4 year olds and their lack of filter. time to get back to the gym i guess
Randomize
