I just got a drinking merit badge from a slutty girl scout
I can hear my fat mexican neighbor yelling "do you like that!" ...I hope its not his dog
Oscar is the man. He keeps getting pictures of hot nude women with messages in spanish saying "i hope you like it" sent to his phone
whose oscar?
the baller who i guess decided to give out a fake number at the bar last weekend. luckily that fake number was mine. i have enough porn to last me until next month.
I don't know if it was the room or her, but as soon as the pants came off, it smelt like a locker room and old man farts.
My absolute favorite part of last night was after I puked in the ally, we rounded the corner and you screamed, "she's ok!" and everyone cheered
They're not that bad of drunks, they come back to the vehicle with more stuff than they went in with, so its a profitable venture.
You should imdb "mourning wood" to see what I'm doing with my $80,000 English degree today
Three Architectural classes: $990.00 Architectural supplies: $300.00 Changing majors and using my architectural supplies to roll blunts: Priceless
I don't know how or when he is sober long enough to donate plasma
I'm pretty sure I said "this might be the last time I'm in here" but then I took his pants off so that's a mixed message
I don't know. Sometimes you can be a wild card with your emotions. Mostly the emotion known as anger.
I'm glad I can share my workout progress with you via my nudes
I might be offended if you don't bang me tomorrow. You know, for America.
All of my friends are hooking up and here I am, the lone asexual, looking for someone to eat these tostitos with me.
So...I maybe walked across campus last night with my life size Joe Biden cut out.
Randomize
