I finally had kitchen counter sex! i was so excited
there's only 1 girl at Mount St Mary that's a virgin. the Mary statue standing outside
you kind of just crawled on top of him. that was the point at which i became concerned with how drunk you were.
That would explain his violent outburst while watching barefoot contessa...
Just watched a drug bust from the Ralphs parking lot while listening to Frank Sinatra. Happy Valentine's Day.
It is 9pm, let the ass parade to the bars begin
Seriously, I'm making a calendar and marking off the days with little penis's
My dick can't jump between your dick and her mouth, man. It's impossible, I think.
She told me to pick her up in the corner of shame and self-disgust.
Long story short I'm making an I'm sorry card for a girl I dont remember having sex with
I don't think stranger penis made your tonsils bleed
I got a gay guy to motorboat me. These tits could change the world, I'm telling you.
I just don’t understand what sort of USPS worker wants to take my unitard and sex toys.
I have bruises everywhere an I broke the lamp. So ya I'd considerate rough sex.
Everybody at Lexi's party found out I'm both a screamer and a moaner after he ate me out on the pool table downstairs. Just another sunday night in Alaska
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