wtf. i just found you're porn stash.
u like it?
NOT THE POINT.
BROstal carolina. Watching a boy drinking rum and coke out of a cup of noodle empty cup.
He let me keep his flannel as a "good job" for the great head I gave him.
I hate that he uses me for something other than sex. What does he think I am? His girlfriend? Ha.
Someone asked me what I was drinking, I was drinking rum, but I was also eating starbursts so i told them "daiquiris"
I just wanna lay in my bed all bundled up as have someone feed me lettuce
I just contemplated drinking cheese dip. And by "contemplated," I mean "attempted and was forcibly stopped from."
I rolled joints beforehand. Lit a candle. Ghetto rigged taping the 40's on my hands and then lit the joint using the flame of the candle.
I'm so proud of your modern ingenuity
ok, i suppose pissing your pants could be considered a wardrobe malfunction.
Do you congratulate someone for having bigger tits, or is that a no no?
If I ever go to jail it will be because of you, I can feel it.
so dehydrated I couldn't fill the pee cup to the right line for my drug test for school. I was like sorry it was my birthday yesterday
All his ex-girlfriends are delicate flowers, tho. And I'm like a trash compactor.
I wouldn't worry about it. You know what they say, THICK THIGHS MAKE THE DICK RISE.
I like that you're more concerned about how I would find the time to clone you, than the fact that I have your blood.
I'm going to be there later than expected. There was a yo-yo incident...
Randomize
