I FOUND THE PROF I'M GOING TO FUCKKKK.
I love having hate sex.
Watching the 1st game of the world cup. I'll drunk dial you at 8:30 to wake you up for work.
I don't even want to think what you did to boys being that drunk and horny.
Then I wouldn't suggest looking at the pictures from last night.
We had sex after spending two hours in the drunk tank. It was really deep and meaningful
College is the ONLY place where you can pass off morning sickness as being hungover. I'm currently pouring beer in a spray bottle so I can spray it on myself and smell drunk.
nah we got kicked outta the bar after the bouncer saw us putting straws up Chelsea's nose to make her look like a walrus after she fell asleep at the table
You were definitely doing something right. You could only see the colored parts of his eyes a couple of times. I was pretty sure he was dead at some point.
But how will the next generation learn about life choices without a Jersery Shore?
Are there any plans to where i might need to be dressed semi-nicely or is it a "pants optional" weekend?
just texted my dealer that i could taste the blue but not the cheese. i said i could taste blue.
Last night's dream consisted of you, me, a sauce pan full of cocaine and light sabers. I almost cried when I woke up.
Checking my Tinder matches as I sit here in the waiting room at Planned Parenthood. I can't be stopped.
He a gives rim jobs, because, of course a guy who opens doors and makes reservations would lick your anus..like a gentleman.
I feel like I smell like bad decisions
Randomize
