and you said cock pushups were impossible
Words of Wisdom: ordering a pitcher of whiskey cokes, putting a straw in it, and calling it your drink is not socially acceptable
we have to get out to the bar earlier. all of the guys are already committed to the girls they're going home with.
I have your dog in a headlock. Se wants my mushrooms.
Disregard the shoes in the freezer.
I'd introduce you to the guys, but you'd probably make them all fall in love with you
I could do with a Floridian man-harem. Let's do this.
Yea. It was an issue. Great time though. Apparently I went through the coat check, put my coat on and forgot I had it so I tried to go through again and just didn't understand why thy weren't helping me. Dave coat checked his pants.
So are you actually going to come fuck me in the ass this weekend, or was that just you being drunk in a kilt?
Hello. You don't know me, but word on the street is that we are now eskimo sisters. I feel like we should go out for coffee and compare experiences.
Apparently "dick me" was not the response he was looking for.
There still is not and there never will be anything as magical as getting high while listening to William Shatner's version of Bohemian Rhapsody.
Summer bikini season begins today. I hereby declare the commencement of the 2013 HUNT FOR CUNT.
I'll be wearing lingerie and holding a bottle of bourbon so pick up whatever food you think goes with that
Its really awkward pooping while on videochat. Even if you turn the video off.
His nipple licking is glorious
Randomize
