The funny thing about my wife cheating on me is that the guy probably has genital warts now. Sweet.
bl l w
this should be fun to decipher. I'd like to buy a vowel.
Dude, she told me she wanted to bang my dad. I don't know which is worse, the fact that she wants to or the fact that she told me.
im not going to any frat parties next semester. for once i want them to think its actually hard to get in my vagina
Holy fuck, spaghetti burritos are the best idea I've ever had.
At no time is it ever okay for my doctor to compliment my tattoos, when giving me a physical exam.......
And then we will celebrate by drinking and making fun of him. As per usual.
I think there's an ice cream truck out back, but there's no way I can get pants on in time to catch it
He bought the 12 pack of condoms. I take that as a sign of serious commitment.
You kept insisting you found queso that's better than oral sex
It's funny when you can't take a fishing boat because you fucked the captains wife
I will run into the sunset with a fist full of condoms.
Dick is healthier for you than green beans
you better come over.. I need a witness to help prove the couch talks to me
Youre saying I should leave him? Have you seen the dating pool these days? It's terrifying, and in the capital region it's straight Norman Bates
Randomize
