Im mastering the way to pass gas silently.
My dog ate my bag of weed. Thats not the easiest call to the vet to make.
Holy fuck. She looks like Vin Diesel's stuntman
hey just checking if u still hate me for sleeping with your sister?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
So you had sex with my brother?
It sounds like you dont need me to answer that.
im swimming of confusion and bacardi. where do i go from herrrrrre
Were you paying girls to come up and grab my cock and tell me I look like bradley Cooper?
First and foremost she's my friend, but she's also a mistake I make when I'm drunk
Finished watching the entire first season of mighty morphing power rangers. Now I have nothing. Not even a life.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I woke up missing my shoes and my left eyebrow. MY. EYEBROW.
Just tried to do a line with a snorkel I cut off... that is how my Aruba trip is going!
Everyone says she blew me in the bathroom, so I believe it, I just don't REMEMBER.
Ah, Christ. I just saw a D lister I made out with once on a Rock Of Love rerun. Why are you asleep right now? Some weird shit is happening.
in fetal position in his closet not sure if he knows im here... hugging his spongebob cake pan i stole.... now please come find me..
You've had it in your mouth, how have you not seen it?
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