Saw some pubes in our toilet, hope the new look works out tonight.
if being creepy is wrong, then i don't want to be right
Skinny jeans should not be made in size 14. Then, it's just a lie.
i'm transferring to degrassi. i don't care that it's severely canadian. classes are five minutes long, there's no actual work and you can get oot of class whenever you want to go have a dramatic scene with someone in the hall
You took a fire extinguisher off the wall in the hallway to play Ghostbusters.
He challenged me to a drink off, I couldn't just say no. It was a matter of pride really.
And as he was cursing your name from the bathroom you were ordering yourself another drink on his tab. The poor bastard had no clue you were a pro drunk
All my money is going towards making my vagina hairless
Worth it.
I'm going to be an 8 year old girl down there foreverrrr #fountainofyouth
Oh, that was the alley that I ate a pine cone in.
HIS DICK ISNT BIG ENOUGH FOR HIM TO BE THAT PROUD OKAY
I've never been this drunk around this many toddlers
That's it. I'm moving to LA & sitting on his face.
The good thing about country bars is that the men generally look like men. The bad thing is the country music.
Shame - the story of my life.
If it's any consolation she turned out to be has a collection of clown dolls she talks to crazy. And the cops knew why I was calling when she key locked the door from inside.
He wants to play improv games now whenever he gets drunk. Sometimes I just do not have the energy for that kind of a thing
Randomize
