He asked me to sit on his face, but i didnt, for 2 reasons, one, i had just pooped like 20 mins before sex, and two, this could be my future husband. so i skipped on sitting.
part of me always dies a little when i go to the "2 women seeking 1 man" section in craigslist's casual encounters to find nothing there. it's tragic
I decided to name her "day after thanksgiving" because I am sure I just got someone elses leftovers.
wow, so sex, not that great its like masturbating with a warm towelette, like the kind you get at a japanese restaurant
It was either a cute kinda butch tomgirl or a really fem guy. Either way, I made out with it. Bisexuality, my best friend.
Vegas should really enforce the buddy system because if not everyone is going to end up swimming during the water show in front of the Bellagio.
omg. MEgabus. stoned.
Theres these two guys talking.
Apparently all year they've been using me as a standard of drunkenness
Do you have any pictures of me mounting animals that aren't on Facebook?
My mom just made me promise her that i'll care about the next guy I sleep with
Did you go to church in Texas and sign me up?
You need southern Jesus
He ended up buying the equivalent of dinner at a Mexican place, in weed
I shotgunned a beer immediately puked and rallied. And by rallied I mean had sex in the bathroom after he held my hair.
What a gentleman.
There are twenty eight units in that building. There has to be at least one heterosexual in it. You can't have fucked your way through all of it.
so i'm with my friends driving on the highway and just saw a guy in the car next to us sucking on a dildo. can't make this shit up.
Randomize
