Its where this guy sticks a jar up his ass. Be prepared to be suspended between vomiting and cheering.
im so hungover...we just watched The Perfect Storm and i got seasick
I just lost $50 at the races, got drunk, and woke up to my ex-gf. Apparently the good decisions kept on rolling...
note to self... there IS such a thing as having too many birthday shots...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I can get orange kush...
GET IT NOW! WHY IS THERE A DOT DOT DOT?!
with your flexibility, and the size of my penis, amazing things are possible.
my wrists were so small for the handcuffs, i could slip them off and hand the tow truck driver my keys....
We're the only two others left at work. My internal monologue is going: TAKE ME. TAKE ME NOWW. ON THE COUNTER. IN FRONT OF THE MANAGER. JUST TAKE MEEE
Don't feel sorry for me. I'm getting Red Lobster and sex tonight. Nothing can bring me too far down.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I clipped one of my extensions in his hair to give him a rat tail. What is my life?
I think it was clear she was setting us up when she brought me over to you and said "Present!"
Made it just outside my dorm and yack on the front dirt. Wave to a dad thats staring, continue on my way.
Best day ever, my junk is bigger than Kate Uptons boyfriends. Yay for Fappening day!
Between fucking and sleeping I woke up missing four out of five of the earrings I was wearing. It's like a star rating system. I had to give him props.
this is a mass text: the cage has been opened. repeat, the cage has been opened. a search party will be organized. you are all sloppy bitches. that is all.
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