yeah I know. she is a stupid fat trailer trash bitchwhore and I hate her
but when she came up to me in the bar I had to be all like "OMG HEYYY how are you, I haven't seen you in foreverrrrr!!"
but for the record, yeah, I hope she gets mauled by a bear and dies
Woke up to a denim duvet cover this morning... why r guys so tacky?
Stop bringing these fucking whores home with you. If I have to fight over the remote with a bleach blonde idiot wanting to watch the hills reruns one more time I'm pissing in your shampoo.
I don't even have to turn the heat on in my car. Just fart the whole way home.
This girl is drinking wine and watching grey's anatomy in the library during finals week. I hate comm majors.
Well, a cop just pulled up. This could go either way.
I'm okay.. I had a good heart to heart with the cab driver Raheem - it's going to be our year.
It's pretty fantastic. I just wanna know how your bra ended up in the aquarium the other night.
Yeah its great. Whenever we want a new bowl we hand it to Trevor and he clears it in one hit. Definitely one of the benefits to having a swimmer in your circle.
Ended up getting hot boxed in a limo with a bunch of asians going to a karaoke bar. I think I pretended to understand their language for a solid hour. Am I bilingual now?
Yea no bueno and I only brought enough weed to last one night. And it was no Hanukah nug, it didn't last 8 days.
I couldn't think of the word "bath" so instead I told him I was marinating in soapy water
I am in an eBay bidding war over a build a bear one direction tshirt, this is who you choose to bone
i dont think sending her flowers will make her forgive you running over her foot.
If my dildo had feelings, they. Would've deffinately been hurt. He put that toy to shame..
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