How do you feel about the band name "O'labia Newton John"??
Was just grinding with my bio TA. She asked why i wasnt studying
Using Dr. Seuss quotes to ask me how badly I want your penis is not appropriate.
I just found out my mom named me after her fake ID from college...
he left his wallet here so lets treat ourselves to a lunch for the lack of penis we both had deal with
I'm still not walking right. We need some boundaries for "drink-or-dare"...
Im pretty sure it started going awry when I asked their mom "How much would it cost me to sleep with your daughters"
Def walking back to my apt with a blender, an empty vodka bottle, and a half eAtn drumstick cone.
That's the girl I met who was peeing on the driveway with me. We bonded
This is America. Deny every slut accusation or own up to it
How the fuck you gonna play love don't cost a thing in a strip club?
Well I guess I'll go shower now and wash all the stripper off.
Dude the little bong I just got fits nicely in the cup holder in my car. The gods approve of my habits.
I think it was a smart move. Quickest way to get over a guy, hook up with his friends.
I just want to nap all the time and eat Chinese food.
Randomize
