she took out her dip, threw up, and put it back in. it was like a scene from Nick and Nora's trip to the trailer park.
What do ugly girls do when they get too drunk at parties. They can't pull the whole "sorry i passed out on your couch but i'm hot so it doesn't matter "card
I just sold my mom a dimebag. Should I feel scared or sucessful?
I have never made a good decision in that bathroom...
Fuck you. You would only tell me how to get to your house in Spanish.
Dude, you need to understand there is a fine line between "guilty pleasure" and in the closet gay
Did you get your crutches off the street sign?
It's an "im going to have to shit with the lights off" type of morning
Hot freshmen.....hot freshmen chicks everywhere
You say this every welcome week, bro.
All I remember is a very aggressive two-stepper who inadvertently made me give myself a black eye with my own beer
Teacher vividly described one of the times he did shrooms, sat down, sighed, and told everyone to go do drugs and let us out 15 minutes into class. I love community colleges
I told him we can’t see each other today because absence makes the heart grow fonder but mostly I just need to rest my vag
I just found out why people like handcuffs.
I promise your sink was clogged before I threw up in it.
We couldn't find her anywhere. Finally, I saw her sitting in my bathroom floor spraying hair mouse into her mouth and whispering "I fucking love whipped cream." WHAT DID YOU GIVE HER AND CAN I HAVE SOME?
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